Dilemma Any International Adoptive Parents Might Face – Being parent is not easy, both for biological and adoptive parents. Each of them has different challenges and dilemma. If you think that adoptive parents face fewer problems, wait until you see the reality. You might be freed from pregnancy and birth labor, but dealing with family member is never easy.
– Did I Do The Right Thing?
Adoptive parents must have sensed changes before and after the arrival of the child. It could be either encouraging or discouraging. To have new family members from another country means that you will learn about new culture and ethics. As parents, you want to give them better chance and future. However, have you given what is needed?
It is no secret that adoptive children might compare their past and current life. Hearing this for a while, you might also question yourself. Is adopting him or her a good decision? What if you actually pull children further from their best life and potentials? These thought is common when you bet big online in and it will haunt your night, but it is common among adoptive parents.
– So My Kids Have This Condition?
Even with your biological children, there is no guarantee that they will be healthy. The problem with adopted children is their unexpected conditions. Before the adoptions, many parents avoid any children with FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder) and clearly write it in their form. It usually happens when pregnant mother consumes alcohol.
Unfortunately, not all conditions could be avoided easily. Conditions like RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder), PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) could show up years after adoption. You as parents have no choice but help them deal with their condition. It might come out as the biggest shocking news about your children.
– Am I The Right Person?
Discussing about parenting adopted children, you will reach some points where you question yourself; am I the right person? What if there is somebody out there who can be better parents for my children? What if I slow down their progress instead?
Once again, dealing with children adopted from different country and culture is not for those with weak hearts. You need unconditional love, never ending care and opened point of view. Otherwise, you might lose your sanity one day.
Though you have chance to meet angel-like-children, there is equal possibilities to meet children with trauma in the past. As a family member, backing up is not an option. You have to deal with them, If you have ever experiences break down, remember that this is part of your parental journey.
Three Types of Adoption Options That You Might Need to Know
How Much Does Adoption Cost Actually?
Most people asking about the cost of adoption are likely to expect something explained short and sweet. And they would tend to wish that the answer is something they can afford. However, answering this kind of question is not effective without taking into consideration the fact about there are several types of adoption process out there. In the US, $30,000 would be the average cost of adoption. But the actual total cost varies greatly depending on a lot of factors so much so that that estimate could shift. In the case of private domestic infant adoption, 60% of adoption processes range from $10,000 to $30,000 at a general range of from $5,000 to $40,000.
An independent adoption through an adoption lawyer costs only slightly less than through an agency. This may be attributed to the fact that some of the cases involve adoptive and birth parents have already met and they only require a lawyer to finalize everything legally. If domestic adoption has cost that much already, you might be wondering about how much it would take for international adoption. This is a case that needs to be observed using the child’s country of origin as a perspective.
You can go to the Adoption Country Charts to find out the cost for each country. The top three sending countries are China ($20,000-$40,000), Ethiopia ($20,000-$40,000), and South Korea ($20,000-$40,000). In contrast, foster care adoption can be said to be virtually free. Only a handful of families have to pay more than two thousand dollars with many other don’t even pay a dime. Foster care adoption comes with a monthly subsidy to the foster care to help reimburse the expenses spent to raise the adopted kids. The tax credit for adoption is no longer refundable and has been made permanent in 2013.